I just want to die.”īartender: “That’s not what I’d do. The man: “I’m gonna drink myself to death. The bartender says “Oh, man, that’s awful! What are you going to do?” I wanted to surprise my wife, and… I caught her in bed with another man.” The bartender says “Hey, buddy, are you okay?” The man replies, “Tell me about it, do you really think I wished for a twelve inch pianist?”Ĥ. “This thing is definitely broken!” says the bartender. The bartender happily grabs the lamp and wishes for a million bucks and the room is suddenly filled with a million ducks. The man then hands the bartender the lamp and says, “You can try it if you want.” The man looks up and says, “I have this magic lamp that grants me wishes, but the stupid thing is broken.” The bartender says, “Wow! That’s amazing! Where did you find they guy?” He reaches into the bag and pulls out a tiny piano and a tiny man that sits down and starts playing the piano. Towards the end of the night the bartender offers the man a free beer if the man shows him what is in the bag. The night continues and the bartender keeps asking but the man keeps giving him the same answer.

The man says, “Nothing, don’t worry about it” A man walks into a bar with a bag and orders a drink.Īfter awhile, the bartender asks him, “What is in the bag?” The bartender wandered out of the bar and asked, “Say partner, before you go… what happened in Texas?” The cowboy turned back and said, “I had to walk home.”ģ. He saddled up and started to ride out of town. The man, true to his word, had another beer, walked outside, and his horse has been returned to the post. “Alright, I’m gonna have another beer, and if my horse ain’t back outside by the time I finish, I’m gonna do what I dun in Texas! And I don’t like to have to do what I dun in Texas!” “Which one of you sidewinders stole my horse?!” he yelled with surprising forcefulness. He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without even looking and fired a shot into the ceiling. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. The man takes another look at the meat, then says, “I think I’ll pass. If you miss even one, you have to pay for everyone else’s drinks for the rest of the night. The bartender says, “If you can jump up and slap all three pieces at once, you get free drinks for an hour. He asks the bartender “what’s with the meat?” As he sits down, he looks up and notices three pieces of meat hanging from the ceiling.

Tiny piano blow into